MY BABY GIRL / MARILEE (MOM) ON AUGUST 26 MY BABY GIRL WILL BE TURNING 18 . THE DAY I HAD JESSICA I WAS A SCARED TEENAGER. BUT THE MOMENT I SAW HER BEAUTIFUL FACE I KNEW MY LIFE WAS CHANGED FOREVER. THAT WITH THIS ANGEL IN MY LIFE I COULD DO ANYTHING. HAVING HER IN MY LIFE MADE ME THE WOMAN I AM TODAY. JESSICA IS MY FIRST CHILD AND FIRST LITTLE GIRL. IN 1995 HER LIL SIS AMBER WAS BORN. HOW SHE LOVED HER LIL SIS. THEN IN 2003 HER LIL BRO WAS BORN SHE SAID FINALLY A LITTLE BOY IN OUR FAMILY. JESSICA WOULD JUST BE STARTING HER LIFE AS A YOUNG WOMEN. SHE WOULD HAVE GRADUATED IN MAY 2006 AND BEGINNING COLLEGE IN AUGUST 2006. I'M SO PROUD OF MY ANGEL SHE WAS A BEAUTIFUL STRONG YOUNG LADY. I COULD NOT BE PROUDER. SHE IS MY DAUGHTER,BEST FIREND, AND ANGEL .
My Prayers are with you and your Family........... / Stacey Streets (Angel Mom To Aidan ) I wish I had something helpful or cathartic to say that would ease your pain if even just a little bit. All I can say is that I truly, from the depths of my soul, understand your pain and loss. Even though I had Aidan for a just for a moment, no loss of a child is greater than another. I hope and pray that God gives you the strength, peace, and faith to survive this. It's a road no one wants to go down, but once you have, you can never come back. Thank you for sharing your angel with me. I know we don't physically know each other, but I feel that bereaved parents are connected forever. I admire you for being so strong, such a wonderful inspiration to others, and for being such a great mommy to your angel. God bless you and your family. Stacey Streets~Angel Mommy To Aidan~ http://ourlittleangel.memory-of.com/About.aspx
MY BABY GIRL / MARILEE (JESSICA'S MOM ) IT'S BEEN 8 MONTHS SINCE I'VE SEEN YOUR BEAUTIFUL FACE HEARD YOUR SOFT VOICE AND YOUR SILLY LAUGH. I AM HURTING MORE THAN EVER NOW.IT JUST GETS HARDER AND HARDER. BUT ALL YOUR FRIENDS ARE HELPING MOMMY WITH THERE KIND WORDS. KELLY ORANGE I WANT TO THANK YOU FOR ALL YOUR KIND WORDS. PLEASE E-MAIL ME I WOULD REALLY LIKE TO HAVE LUNCH WITH YOU ONE DAY. I KNOW JESS WOULD LIKE THAT. EVERYONE TELLS ME BE STRONG FOR AMBER AND D.J. BUT THATS REAL HARD WHEN MY HEARTS IS IN SO MUCH PAIN. I LOST MY DAUGHTER AND BEST FRIEND. PLEASE JESS JUST HELP ME BE STRONGER. I LOVE YOU MY SWEET ANGEL.
Happy New Year Jessica / Johnette Moninger (Friend)
May God's richest blessings be upon you today and throughout the year-and may those blessings flow through you to touch the lives of everyone you meet.
a letter from up above / Kelly Orange (co worker from winn-dixie ) I know this is a rough time for you. So I will be as gentle as I can be.
First of all, thank you for so many tears, particularly those shared with another that you love. They are a gift to me, a precious tribute to your investment in me.
As you do your mourning, do it at your pace only. Don’t let anybody suggest that you do your grief work on their timetable. Do whatever it takes to face directly the reality of what has happened, even though you may need to pause frequently and yearn for my return. Do this with courage and my blessings. Know that sometimes inertia is the only movement possible.
Give your best to keeping a balance between remembering me and renewing your commitments to life. It’s O.K. with me if you go through minutes, hours and even days not thinking about me. I know that you’ll. never forget. Loosening me and grabbing hold of a new meaning is a delicate art. I’m not sure if one comes before the other or not, maybe it’s a combination. Be with people who accept you as you are. Mention my name out loud, and if they don’t make a hasty retreat, they’re probably excellent candidates for friendship.
If, by a remote possibility, you think that there is anything that you could have done for me and didn’t. I forgive you, as my Lord does. Resentment does not abide here, only love.
You know how people sometimes ask you how many children you have? Well, I’m still yours and you are still my parents. Always acknowledge that with tenderness, unless to do so would fall on insensitive ears or would be painful to you. I know how you feel inside. To be included as your child honours me.
Read, even though your tears anoint the page. There is an immense library here and I have a card. In Henri Nowens’ "Out of Solitude", he writes, "The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair and confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not healing, and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares."
Mom and Dad, I don’t know where you are spiritually now, but rest assured that our God is not gone. The still small voice you hear in your heart is His voice. The warmth that sometimes enfolds you is Him. The tears that tremble just beneath your heartbeat is Him. He is in you, as I am.
I want you both to know that I am O.K. I have sent you messages to ease your pain, they come in the form of flowers that bloom out of season, birds singing, voices and visions and sometimes through your friends and even strangers who volunteer as angels. Stay open but don’t expect the overly dramatic. You will get whet you need and it may be simply an internal peace. You are not crazy, you have been comforted.
Please seek out people bereaved longer than you. They are tellers of truth, and if they have done there work, are an inspiration and a beacon of hope whose pain lessened dramatically and one more wisdom before I close. There are still funny happenings in our world. It delights me to no end when I hear your spontaneous, uncontrolled laughter. That, too, will come in due time.
Today, I light a candle for you. Joined with your candle, let their light shine above the darkness.
Affectionately, Your Angel child. R.I.P Jessica and Miguel Both of you went to be with Our Lord Jesus Christ In 2005 but we all Shall meet one day very soon and it will be a great HOMECOMING !!! <3 "One Love !!" <3 1- Kelly Orange
son or daughter / Kelly Orange (old co worker from winndixie ) I said, God I hurt And God said, I know
I said, I cry alot And God said, That's why I gave you tears
I said, Life is so hard And God said, That's why I gave you loved ones
I said, But my loved one died!! And God said, So did mine!!
I said, It's such a great loss!! And God said, I saw mine nailed to a cross!!
I said, But your loved one lives!! And God said, So does yours!!
I said, Where is he now?? And God said, My Son is by my side and Your Son is in my arms!! it doesnt matter if you lose your son or daughter it matters on who they are with right now ! so ask this question to your self "who do i want to be with when i die ?"-kelly orange
"Have you ever met an angel?" / Chasity Taylor (close friend ) Have you ever met an angel? Maybe an angel in disguise? Who was always there for you, Who held your hand when you cried? Was there a glow around them? Was it that gorgeous white? Did it shine so beautifully, This heaven-sent light? Was there a beautiful face Along with a beautiful mind? Would there be a beautiful parting If you had to say goodbye? Well you know, I've met an angel, I found my angel in disguise But my angel got her wings My angel learned to fly.
I love you Jess!! Miss you always!!
To A sweet girl...full of laughter! / Julia Zimmerman (Luv u Man! )
Laughter
God made us a gift of laughter. We must use it often to hide stern, unhappy thoughts, maybe harsh words to soften. We shouldn't laugh at others, then they might laugh at us. Giggly voices or silly actions just might avoid a fuss. The tone of laughter is a song, a tune we all should sing. A melody that might accompany happy angels on the wing. It's Christmas time around about, I hear carols and sound of a bell. Lights, Santas and Christmas trees, crystal and brass with tolling and knell. Laughter of children bubbles around us, making us laugh all the more. It brings up happy memories that we've laughed about before.
I have procrastinated this portion of the website for almost two months now. Since, placing this experience in writing, makes it all the more a reality. And there's only so much we can run away from, I guess 'til we just confront our fears. However, just moments ago for some "unexplicable" reason, I decided to sit at my pc and write within this section. Here it goes...
Jessica...was sent to us at such a difficult time in my/our life. We had just lost her father (my brother) just months before her having been born. As I flashback to that time, I can still hear my brother's words to my mother..."soon you will have a great gift", he said. He was so happy, at the fact he was becoming a father soon. Tragically, he was called to heaven not to long after finding out he and Marilee were becoming parents. When I lost my brother I felt no one could ever replace him, but was comforted by the happiness of awaiting his one and only baby, "Jessica". After months of anticipation, she was born, and I could not describe the elation I felt. I remember the very first time my eyes laid sight on her...I remember nurses wheeling babies from the nursery area unto the rooms...I was standing in the hallway with my mother, as a nurse wheeled the last baby by, and as I gazed unto that particular baby, I remember telling my mother and father, "that's her,that's her...there she is", her last name wasn't on there yet...but I knew that had to be our baby. She was so beautiful, and I have always said she was always the most beautiful baby I had ever seen. She had the best of her mother and the best of her father going for her, and that is/was Jessica. I sincerely believe she was sent to me as an angel, and for that I have thanked and will always be grateful to our GOD above, to her mother (Marilee), and to my brother (Jose) for having provided her as a gift to all of us. She is and was a blessing, as I saw her for not only whom she is/was, but whom she represented. And it is with this, that I promised her, the day she "left to heaven" that her love and her memory will always be a "sacred" part of me...she will forever be with me, embedded as a part of me in my soul. She was an extraordinary young lady, with incredible feelings and love and zest for life. I'll always cherish the love you always gave me, Jess. I know you are and must be a very busy angel, but I want you to fly as high as you can, alongside your father...until I too can be there with you two. I loved and will always love you and your father...until then angel(s).
Tia Ami December 18th, 2005 (Sunday)
we miss u so much angel... / Laureta Gjuraj (b/f 4ever )
"My Mom is a Survivor"
My Mom is a survivor, or so I've heard it said. But I can hear her crying at night when all others are in bed.
I watch her lay awake at night and go to hold her hand. She doesn't know I'm with her to help her understand.
But like the sands on the beach that never wash away.... I watch over my surviving Mom who thinks of me each day.
She wears a smile for others... a smile of disguise! But through Heaven's door I see tears flowing from her eyes.
My Mom tries to cope with death; To keep my memory alive. But anyone who knows her knows it is her way to survive.
As I watch over my surviving Mom through Heaven's open door... I try to tell her that angels protect me forevermore!
I know that doesn't help her, or ease the burden she bears. So, if you get a chance, go visit her. Show her that you care.
For no matter what she says... no matter what she feels. My surviving Mom has a broken heart that time won't ever heal.
i'm sorry i kno i'm writing a little to much but i just want to thank you for everything....and the web site b/cuz i feel like i can talk to jess on here altho that sounds really stupid ,but thats how i feel.....u have been like a mother to me and i thank u with all my heart i love u.
"There She Goes Again"/ for a mother / Laureta Gjuraj (bestfriend)
"There She Goes Again"
Oh, there she goes again! Mom is just staring at my photograph. While I wish she could hear my voice; She wishes she could hear me laugh. Her heart goes to a place too many other mothers have been. Somewhere a heart repairs. Oh, there she goes again.
Another night up until dawn. She watches the sun rise; While she longs to feel my touch, I long for her to know who dries her teary eyes. I've heard my Mom say her world stands still. But really it's in a spin. Oh, I know how she feels. But, there she goes again.
Oh there she goes again. My Mom holds my photograph. While she longs to hear my voice ... I long to hear her laugh. And though her heart is broken, her smile is like back when. My Mom appears to Mothers as a fighter like no other. Oh there's nothing like her grin. There's no one like you, Mom. Oh, there she goes again. Oh yes, she holds my photograph and longs to hear my laughter. I calm the fear of a heart within ... And will do so each day hereafter! Oh but, there she goes again.
this one is also for you marilee ,i love you...
"At the Request of an Angel" / Laureta Gjuraj (bestfriend)
"At the Request of an Angel"
Yesterday, in Heaven, a sweet angel, went to our Father's throne. This angel said, "Dear Lord, tomorrow, my Mom just can't be left alone!"
The angel said, "My Heavenly Father, I've been in Heaven for almost a year. Wearing wings made of silver & gold... While Mom's face is stained with tears.
She's going to need me tomorrow, to give comfort and ease her pain. I want to surround her with all my love, Cause her tears still flow like rain!
You have your Mother too, Lord who once felt the pain of losing you... She knows what it is like for a Mother, to feel misery the whole day through...!"
Our Father looked at this precious angel, who was kneeling at His Throne, He said, "Take a Band of Angels with you, so your Mom won't ever feel alone!
As you embrace her with your love, I'll reach down with loving arms; I'll touch her with My love and assurance, that you'll protect her from all harm!..."
Oh! What a sight it must have been today! To see these Angels with golden wings, Following that precious angel to your heart... Bringing all the love they could bring!
Yes, your angel is always with you, no matter what the circumstance... So, if you feel a tug at your heart today... It's your angel asking you for a dance.
~Never an End ~
Dedicated to the Moms who have to live through that day again.
I know how hard it is for you Marilee but i hope you never feel alone because you know Jess will do anything to make you happy......i love u always, Laureta i miss you my angel....
Missing you / Allison Mullins (close friend ) Jessica i'm really missing you alot...everyday i think of you and it never seems to get easier. i don't understand why you had to go and i probably never will i'm just glad i got to spend the time we had together. you were a great friend to me from the moment u moved here and i met u. even you being gone i'm still amazed at how wonderful you were. i just miss you and can't wait to see you again some day. i love you and always will.
love always, Allison Mullins
1 of many favorite memories / Marti Vest (close friend )
it was last year on thanksgiving nite..after eating dinner a bunch of us in several different cars had left to go to the movies..we went and saw GOTHIKA..a scary movie..well, those of you who know me know i do not watch scary movies..but i went..well after the movies it was late around 11pm maybe even midnite and we had to drive from gainsville back to chiefland..long drive down some dark roads..in my car was jessica,myself and her aunt yvonne..well again i normally do not go to scary movies especially in the evening so i had to do alot of laughing on the way home..at the time i was driving a nissan sentra that had a radio problem..it would make clicking sounds everynow and then without even being on..well it started doing that..it was also very cold outside and the windows were fogging up..jessica was in the backseat and her aunt yvonne was upfront with me..all of a sudden she said "did you hear that"..her aunt looked at me and i said hear what(we both heard it but we did'nt want her to know that)..it was the radio making the clicking sound..it happened several times and we kept telling her we could not hear a thing..again teasing her..well, to sum things up we told her it was the main character from the movie talking to her..we laughed the whole way home..i have many many favorite memories of jess but this one always stands out..jess u will always be in my thoughts..i miss you everyday..love marti
...ANGELS BELONG IN HEAVEN... / JEANNIE LYNN CHARLES (1 OF HER BEST FRIENDS ) JESSICA HAS MADE A BIG DIFFERENCE IN EVERYONE'S LIVES, BIG OR SMALL SHE HAS MADE AN IMPACT IN OUR LIVES. I REMEMBER WE MET IN CLASS, SHE ASKED ME A SIMPLE QUESTION TO BE HER PARTNER IN A PROJECT WE HAD TO DO. AFTER THAT, WE BECAME REALLY GOOD FRIENDS. AS SCHOOL WENT ON WE BECAME CLOSER AND CLOSER. TILL THE UNTHINKABLE DAY CAME. IF ITS SOOO HARD FOR ALL OF JESSICA'S FRIENDS TO GO THROUGH THIS, JUST IMAGINE THE PAIN HER MOTHER AND HER FAMILY IS GOING THROUGH. I KNOW ITS HARD, BUT THATS WHY WE'RE ALL COMFORTING EACH OTHER AND BEING THERE AND BEING STRONG FOR EACH OTHER TO HELP GET THROUGH THE LOSS. WE ALL KNOW THAT JESSICA IS IN HEAVEN LOOKING DOWN AT ALL OF US. AT LEAST NOW WE KNOW SHE'S IN A BETTER PLACE. GOD TOOK HER BECAUSE IT WAS HER TIME. ANGELS BELONG IN HEAVEN AND WE'LL ALL BE WITH HER AGAIN SOMEDAY. I WILL KEEP JESSICA AND HER FAMILY IN MY PRAYERS. LOVE YOU JESS SOOOO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOTS OF LOVE, JEANNIE LYNN <3<3<3
I'll see you again someday / Chasity Taylor (friend)
I'm hoping for a miracle that maybe one day it will all be okay. I'm thinking that time has flown by and it's not fair. I'm wishing I could see your smile that lit up every room that you went in to. I'm missing you so much that I don't know how much more my heart can take. I'm watching Laureta and seeing her strenth, it's helping me. I'm dreaming that maybe this is a nightmare and that I'll wake up and you'll still be here. But I know that it's false hope and that it won't happen. I love you Jess, now and always, and I know you're watching over us and holding our hands. Help us hold our heads up high. I'll see you soon.
Happy Birthday / Elaine Grandma Of ~* ~. Nekoda Rogers (connected by angels )Read >>
Happy Birthday / Elaine Grandma Of ~* ~. Nekoda Rogers (connected by angels ) Close
Still thinkin... / Chasity Taylor (Close Friend )
Hey girl. Been a while since I've been to the page. Still think about you all the time though. Can't believe it's already been 3 years. I miss you girl. But I know that you're still here...just can't see ya. Well, things finally started comin together for me...just like you said..everything's ok. I don't know if I ever told you thanks for being the great friend that you were...just in case, thanks. We love you girl and we miss you!! Close
Still thinkin... / Chasity Taylor (Close Friend )
Hey girl. Been a while since I've been to the page. Still think about you all the time though. Can't believe it's already been 3 years. I miss you girl. But I know that you're still here...just can't see ya. Well, things finally started comin together for me...just like you said..everything's ok. I don't know if I ever told you thanks for being the great friend that you were...just in case, thanks. We love you girl and we miss you!! Close
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